Fix You
by WalkingWit
Summary: Rose and the Meta Crisis Doctor's journey in trying to get past the angst and heal. Set in Pete's World, where everything seems familiar but is different. Prequel to Bridging the Gap.
1. Sound of Silence

**A prequel to Bridging the Gap. Inspired by a Youtube video about the Human Doctor and Rose set to "Fix You" by Coldplay. Tennant's Coldplay love makes it all the better, I think. I don't own Doctor Who or the songs used.**

**Sound of Silence**

_In restless dreams I walked alone  
><em>_Narrow streets of cobblestone  
><em>_'Neath the halo of a street lamp  
><em>_I turned my collar to the cold and damp  
><em>_When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light  
><em>_That split the night  
><em>_And touched the sound of silence_

-Simon and Garfunkel, 'The Sound of Silence'

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><p>Here, in her new home, on this new yet familiar planet, she was all alone. Alone with her thoughts. While London looked like London, it wasn't her London. It was duller, less lively. Quieter. Colder. At least, she thought it was duller. Maybe she was imagining it. He had been the light and excitement in her life, and now he was gone. The silence was deafening in her humdrum existence because she knew what she was missing. All of the adventures they could be having were mere dreams in her mind.<p>

The lack of noise in her new room was disturbing. There was no comforting hum to lull her to sleep. He was no longer there to tinker about, fixing things late into the night because he didn't sleep. No more soothing words would be whispered to her as she drifted off into dreamland, him not daring to leave her side 'til she was fast asleep. Sometimes, he would stay with her anyways, always leaving just before she woke.

No more dancing. No more running. Her hands would never clasp his as they took off down some eerie passage. No more risking their lives for one another.

Her room was designed to look like the one she had. She didn't have the pictures. She slid onto the ground, sobbing hysterically. Her life was gone, everything she lived for was gone. She should have died. At least then, she wouldn't have to think about him or dream about him constantly. She didn't want the maids catering to her every whim and the beaming mansion. She wanted him.

All she heard was a buzzing between her ears. Jackie worried, but all she could muster was a half-hearted smile that didn't reach her eyes. She felt weak, tired and alone.

Pete situated her with a job at Torchwood. There, she stared at an image of the Sycorax blankly. Blank. She was completely blank without him.

Whenever the maids vacuumed, she thought it was him coming to take her home. She had a breakdown in the produce section of the market. There, holding a bunch of bananas, she cried like a madwoman. She couldn't even look at them anymore, let alone eat them.

She bought a men's leather jacket and draped it over a chair in her room. She bought Chucks, too. She liked to pretend that he had stepped out for a moment and had forgotten it. Any second, he'd be back for the jacket. And for her. Whether it was old blue eyes or pinstripes, she didn't care. She loved them both, because they were both him.

She hated herself for missing him. On an endless loop in her mind she was bombarded with images of him. His eyes, his laugh, his smile. Silly little things had been etched into her memory until the end of time.

He had moved on. She was certain of it. She knew fully well she was just one of the many companions he had. Still, she wanted a proper farewell. He wasn't going to magically appear, and she refused to sit around waiting like Sarah Jane. She threw all of her energy into trying to find him. She needed him to finish his sentence. "Rose Tyler—" he had been cut off mid-sentence. He disappeared into thin air as if he never existed. But he did exist.

She knew that if she found him, he might've regenerated. She didn't care. She loved him with blue eyes and a leather jacket and with manic hair and a penchant for pinstripes. She'd love him no matter the face.

All of her efforts paid off. But, here she was standing on Bad Wolf Bay, watching him leave her again. Except now, she wasn't alone. The Human Doctor took her hand reassuringly. She turned to look at him, wiping the tears from her face. The Doctor hadn't been able to say it. Nor did he give so much as a backwards glance. But this man, this Doctor did say it.

"Rose Tyler, I love you," he repeated.

And for the first time on this planet, Rose Tyler smiled a real, genuine smile. The world didn't seem as dreadfully grim. Everything seemed a little lighter, and a little brighter. The terrible sound of silence was gone. In its place was the sound of waiting adventure. And it would be fantastic.

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><p><strong>I do think vacuums do sound like the TARDIS, or maybe I'm just bonkers. This won't necessarily be in chronological order. It's jumpy and a bit timey-wimey. I'll probably indicate when a chapter takes place if it's not obvious.<strong>

**Please review, it'd be greatly appreciated.**


	2. Starlight

**A prequel to Bridging the Gap. Inspired by a Youtube video about the Human Doctor and Rose set to "Fix You" by Coldplay. Tennant's Coldplay love makes it all the better, I think. I don't own Doctor Who or the songs used.**

**Starlight**

_Starlight,  
><em>_I will be chasing the starlight  
>Until the end of my life... <em>

_My life  
>You electrify my life<br>Let's conspire to re-ignite  
>All the souls that would die just to feel alive<br>__I'll never let you go  
>If you promise not to fade away, never fade away<br>Our hopes and expectations  
>Black holes and revelations<br>Hold you in my arms  
>I just wanted to hold you in my arms<br>__I just wanted to hold..._

Muse, "Starlight"

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><p>He is the last son of Gallifrey. He is 903 years old. He is the Doctor, the space man who travels in his blue box. And he is terribly alone, despite having a companion along for most of his travels. These companions eventually leave him, moving along with their lives. He moves on, too. That is, he did. But then he lost <em>her<em>. She brought light and energy into his cynical life. She gave him a reason to keep going. Then she let go of that damn lever. Trapped in a parallel world, dead on her world. That was the day his hearts started to beat a little bit slower, a little more reluctant to keep going.

He had to say his goodbyes as a hologram. It hurt too much to see her but not be able to hold her, to console her. He could never hold her, comfort her, or see her ever again. And it killed him. It killed him to watch the tears run across her face as she clutched her stomach, shaking. He had felt his hearts clench when she had mentioned the baby. He thought she had moved on. He wished that it was _their_ baby, though it was impossible. She had clarified that Jackie was expecting, and he felt a little better. Part of him had wished she had moved on while the rest of him wanted to be with her, always.

"_I love you_," s_he cried, nearly doubled over in emotional pain. The wind mussed up her blonde hair, her black leather jacket pulled across her form._

_"Quite right," a ghost of a smile flitted across his face, "And I suppose it's my last chance to say it. Rose Tyler-"_

The transmission was cut off, leaving him alone in the TARDIS. He burnt up a sun to say goodbye, and he couldn't even say the thing he most wanted to say. All he wanted, all he needed was her. But he couldn't give her the life she deserved, one with marriage and children. It hurt too much knowing he could never be with her. Never hold her. Never be the one to kiss her goodnight or be the first to see her in the morning. It was impossible.

That is, until now. Here he was on Bad Wolf Bay. This time, he wasn't a hologram. He was flesh and bone, and human. He had one heart. Her hand rested against his chest, feeling his single beating heart. His gaze followed hers as she turned back to face the Time Lord Doctor. Here was his chance to tell her what he had wanted to for ages. No "Quite right."

"Rose Tyler, I love you," he whispered into her ear.

She pulled away, glassy eyed, and examined his face. She pulled him closer to her and kissed him. And it was fantastic. He longed to hold her, to kiss her, and it happened. His ninth form had kissed her, and in effect he had saved her life. This incarnation hadn't. The other time didn't count, seeing as that bloody Cassandra was possessing her. It was the most wonderful feeling in the universe to hold her again. A non-possessed Rose was kissing him, and it took him a few moments to wrap his mind around the rapid progression of events.

Suddenly, she pulled away as if realising the weight of her decision. She whipped around to look at the Doctor as he walked away, Donna at his side. He didn't even look back. The idiot. Tears streamed down her face as she watched him leave her one last time. Except this time, she wasn't alone.

He stood next to her, taking her hand as they looked at each other. The TARDIS dematerialised, leaving them together. She brushed away tears with her free hand and looked at him again. She smiled, and he grinned back. He had been hoping for her, chasing her for so long, and now they were together. He vowed to himself never to leave her again. He had his starlight back.

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><p><strong>Thank you to all who have put the story on their alerts list or have favorite-ed it. Thank you to my first reviewer, CapriceAnn!<strong>

**Please review. I like feedback and opinions. Reviews keep me going.**


	3. Fix You

**A prequel to Bridging the Gap. Inspired by a Youtube video about the Human Doctor and Rose set to "Fix You" by Coldplay. Tennant's Coldplay love makes it all the better, I think. I don't own Doctor Who or the songs used.**

**Fix You**

_Tears stream down your face  
>When you lose something you can't replace<br>Lights will guide you home  
>And ignite your bone<br>And I will try  
><em>_to fix you_

-Fix You, Coldplay

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><p>The Doctor thought that he needed to be fixed. That's why he had been left here on this strangely familiar planet. That's why he was at the Tyler's, leaning against the door to Rose's room, wishing she would at least talk to him.<p>

They'd begun a tentative relationship, becoming reaccquianted with one another. He kept forgetting he was a human. He would tire easily and sleep, becoming angry that he couldn't do what he used to. Angry that his head hurt with all of the Gallifreyan knowledge stuffed into his inferior human brain.

He was still part Time Lord, but he couldn't help but feel angry at the Doctor. Sure, he had committed genocide against the Daleks, but millions of humans would have died. He honestly didn't understand the logic the Doctor posessed at that point. Sure, as a human he was more brash, more jumpy, but that didn't warrant being sent into exile. Sure, he had a TARDIS coral, but it would take a few years, even with Donna's brilliance. The only bright bit of said exile was Rose.

He dipped his toes into human life. Rose informed him off all the small differences in this world. Coldplay was not as mocked. The Tube was cleaner. Harriet Jones was not dead, in fact. Torchwood was alien-friendly. Prince Charles had passed, leaving William next-in-line, but the Queen still reigned. There was no moon landing by the U.S. The Russians had beat them to it. She mentioned something about alien interference at NASA, some creatures she said that looked like the Ood, but creepier. He tried chips, and found that his human taste-buds quite liked them. There was a pub in downtown London with the best chips, according to Rose. So they had gone together, hand in hand.

Since he had no psychic papers, Pete Tyler situated him with a falseifed birth certificate. (He was from the small village of Gallifrey in Scotland. As of a decade ago, the entire population had left, leaving it untraceable.) He also needed a name. John Smith was the logical choice. But he had to honour Donna in some way.

"Noble?" Pete had asked sceptically.

"I am part Donna, after all."

He noticed the ever so slight wince that Rose made. For those first few days, she was wary of him. Trying not to get attached. But he was so loveable. Still her Doctor. She had grown as attached to him as ever, it was inevetiable. But he was darker, more cynical. He reminded her of the first Doctor she had met. Bad attitude with a leather jacket. When he told her to run, she did. And she hadn't looked back. He was the Doctor, just a bit more human. But he insisted on being called "John". She couldn't.

His face was pressed up against the side of her door, hearing her wracked sobs. On the other side of the door, she had slid onto the carpet, head resting against the door. She was taken to a time when she had first been torn away from the Doctor, pressing her head against the metal, as if he was just on the other side. Her letting go of the lever. His retreating back. It was all too much. She slammed her hands against the floor. She was supposed to be helping him, but here she was crying.

She had been surprised to see a bit of Nine's personality shining through. At first she had been solemn, as it was a sign that her Doctor no longer existed in him. But then she realised that she had both of her Doctors in him. The bitterness, the sarcasm, she welcomed it. He had begun to mellow, his anger at being abandoned subsiding.

They had both been abandoned. What was to stop him from abandoning her? They had the TARDIS coral. He could get sick of her and up and leave. The tears streamed down her face as the panic set in deeper. The fear of abandonment was all too real. He couldn't leave her again. She wouldn't be able to take it.

A light knock came at the door.

"Rose," he whispered.

She opened the door a crack, his teary eyes matching her own. She leapt to her feet, hugging him.

"Don't leave me," she said.

He looked at her, flabbergasted. How was he to know a throwaway jab at running away from Jackie's chattering could make her so emotional?

"Never, Rose Tyler," he hugged her to his chest, running his hand through her golden hair.

"Even when the TARDIS is fully grown?" she asked.

He pulled away from her, hands on her shoulders.

"Then we'll be travelling the stars together," he assured her.

She smiled lightly, "Well don't we look like a right mess?"

He looked serious, considering it. They both needed some healing, to be fixed. He grinned slightly.

"And I will try to fix you," he sang softly. Her smile broadened, and she shook her head. How could she never become attached to this man? This wonderful, crazy man.

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><p><strong>So, a bit sappy, but I like it well enough. So, who thought the Doctor's Wife was a brilliant episode? I did, especially because Rory's the "Pretty One". And bunkbeds are cool. Anyways, thank you for reading. Please review, I appreciate it.<strong>


	4. The Scientist

**A prequel to Bridging the Gap. Inspired by a Youtube video about the Human Doctor and Rose set to "Fix You" by Coldplay. Tennant's Coldplay love makes it all the better, I think. I don't own Doctor Who or the songs used.**

**Note: Sorry it's taken a while. I was taking final exams, and then my apartment building locked the WI-FI, so I had to go get a password. But I'm back!**

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><p><strong>The Scientist<strong>

_Nobody said it was easy  
>It's such a shame for us to part<br>__No one ever said it would be so hard  
>Oh take me back to the start<em>

"The Scientist" -Coldplay

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><p>He was angry. That was all. He was upset and angry and his head hurt. All of this knowledge was cramped in his tiny, insignificant human brain, and he felt as though he would soon explode. Whether from the anger or the pain, he didn't know. Anger at the Doctor for leaving him. Anger at himself for having committed a genocide. Sure, they were damn Daleks, but he was a murderer, simple as that. Anger at her for not being able to look at him in the eye. Pain in his single heart because of her. He wanted the TARDIS, to zip off into space and never hear Earth's name again. Never hear her name again. But despite him wanting it, he loved her too much to leave. Not again.<p>

He sat across from her at the dinner table, staring blankly. She looked down, focused on her meal. She was in a mood, moping about the entire day. She wouldn't respond to his queries. All she did was sift through some files from work. 'Gettting a headstart' as she put it. She avoided him like the plague, as if looking into his eyes burned her. He knew she was looking for a way back. Back to her Earth. Back to _him_.

Wasn't he enough? She had her memories, she had him. What more could she want? The time he spent away form her nearly killed him. He was a mess without her. Every adventure they had, from the first yelled "Run!" played through his mind. He thought she had finally accepted him, finally loved him. He supposed he was wrong. Maybe it was too much to ask of her, to love a copy. But he was still himself! She even said it. But did she mean it?

"Doctor," she looked up, eyes red and puffy. She had been crying, it was obvious. She waged an internal battle with herself.

"Stop it. I'm John Smith now. I'm not the Doctor," he hissed, closing his eyes. Oh how he wished to go back to that fateful day she let go of the lever, to get her back. Then they'd never be in this mess. But then he'd have to watch her age while he stayed the same.

"Yes, yes you are," Rose slammed her fork on the table, enraged. He is the Doctor. Part human be damned. There was still the old loveable chatterbox in him, and she needed to see it again. Not this quiet, solemn mess.

"If I was, I'd be able to leave this damned planet," he stood from the table, pushing the chair aside. He was frustrated, taking the anger out on her.

Rose watched him with a frightened expression. He would leave her, again. Just up and abandon her.

"You can't just leave me," she said in a small voice.

He shook his head, not wanting another fight. He wouldn't leave her. Couldn't. Another round of tears. Another night spent holding her, the both of them emotionally exhausted. Another day they tried to work through their issues. She could be so selfish sometimes, it sickened him. She didn't realise that it could be much worse. That at least she'd have her memories, if nothing else. She got the better deal. Unlike Donna. Brilliant, lovely Donna was without her memory of him. She'd never remember saving the world. It drove him mad to think that she'd be a shell of her former self, living a simple life in Chiswick. She could've had so much more. Done so much more.

"Oh, always thinking about yourself. Again," he sighed, clutching the top of the chair. His knuckles turned white and the vein in his neck began to pop out. Weeks of silence was bubbling onto the surface.

"Stop it! Just stop it! I'm doing my best to adjust," she frowned.

He ran a hand through his hair, turning around. He whipped back around, facing her.

"You make it sound like you have this terrible life. You have me. Isn't that enough?" the Doctor John asked.

"I could ask you the same thing," she said quietly, looking into his brown eyes, searching for some spark of regret. Regret that he was with her. She didn't see it and she felt a bit relieved, but still wanting to know what was bothering him. He had been avoiding her for days, and when it was her turn to ignore him, he decides to pitch a fit.

"Don't you pin this on me. Don't you play the neglected, or the forgotten. You've never been forgotten."

"You left me!" she shouted, standing up, shaking.

"And I'm sorry, so sorry. If I could go and change it, I would! But I can't. We need to accept the life we have. Together," he sounded almost pleading.

Rose remained silent.

"I'm just so sick of you moping around. We're both angry and nervous. But remember, Rose. Remember everything. The first time we met. All we've been through. At least we have that. Some of us aren't so lucky."

"I don't understand," Rose muttured.

"My headaches. I got the scan back from Torchwood about a week ago. A Time Lord Human is impossible. The knowledge Donna has from the megacrisis will burn her brain, if it already hasn't" he explained shortly, slumping into a seat.

A small gasp escaped Rose.

"She has to forget all about me, the Doctor, us. Or she will die, Rose. My best friend will die if she even remembers me," he looked to Rose, tears pricking his eyes.

She understood now. She knew why he was on edge, so angry. Not at her, just the world. She suddenly felt violently ill. If Donna would die, then he...

"Not you," she stated, but it came out as more of a question.

"I honestly don't know," he responded defeatedly.

Rose hated herself at that very moment. Her awful mood was uncalled for. Her indifferent attitude toward the love of her life was just spite. Spite that he could leave her broken once again. So she attempted to break him back. Breaking each other all day, all week, all month. It needed to end. At least she had her memories of the Doctor, and she had this one. Poor Donna had nothing. So, Rose Tyler moved to John, her Doctor. She hugged him tightly, letting him cry.

"I couldn't save her. If I wasn't alive, she'd be okay," he whispered.

"It's not your fault. You couldn't have known," Rose assured him.

"One day. One day we'll fix this," he promised.

Rose wasn't sure if he was talking about their relationship or Donna or both. Whatever it was, she would do anything to help him across the way. Together.

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><p><strong>So, a bit sappy, but I like it well enough. So, who thought the Doctor's Wife was a brilliant episode? I did, especially because Rory's the "Pretty One". And bunkbeds are cool. <strong>

**I added a bit to this chapter after watching The Rebel Flesh/Almost People. It bugged me that Rose could be so accepting. Seeing Amy question it was better, only to prove that the two Doctors were one in the same. Oh, and the end of the episode was brilliant. The look on poor Rory's face. Gah.**

**As I said, this isn't necessarily in chronological order. The next chapter will be of Torchwood and a few faces we may recognise will pop up, but Rose and her Doctor won't. **

**Please review. I greatly appreciate it. The lack of reviews had gotten me a bit down, but I'll keep writing.**


	5. Mr Blue Sky

**A prequel to Bridging the Gap. Inspired by a Youtube video about the Human Doctor and Rose set to "Fix You" by Coldplay. Tennant's Coldplay love makes it all the better, I think. I don't own Doctor Who or the songs used.**

**Note: Sorry it's taken a while. I was taking final exams, and then my apartment building locked the WI-FI, so I had to go get a password. But I'm back!**

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><p><strong>Mr. Blue Sky<strong>

_Hey you with the pretty face_  
><em>Welcome to the human race<br>A celebration, mister blue sky's up there waitin'  
>And today is the day we've waited for <em>

-ELO, Mr Blue Sky

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><p>He had come so much closer to accepting the fact that he was a human. Able to age and grow old with her. That was his saving grace, that one thought that kept him from lashing out in anger at the Doctor, at the prospect of being stuck on this parallel world which was familiar yet different.<p>

Pete had provided identification and a job. Jackie a place to stay, a room for him. But Rose, Rose had given him a home. A proper home. She was home. And so they had begun to attempt to do domestic.

So while they were currently resigned to live at the Tyler Estate, the TARDIS was growing in the back shed. Soon enough, Rose Tyler and the Doctor would travel the stars once again, having grand adventures.

For now, he was just happy to be there, to be human. All of those conflicting, roaring emotions he let build up inside of them now had a release. She listened to him, talked to him in that sweet voice, and smiled a smile that would make even the Cybermen feel. They had their good and bad days, most of the early days bad and filled with tears, but the good would ouutweigh all of that.

She had dragged him to the shops, Herrod's, Henrik's, and the like. She laughed at his fashion sense, especially when he had accumulated several pairs of Chuck Taylors, pinstriped pants, a long coat, and dress shirts. She had forced him into buying a pair of jeans and plain shirts, which she had deemed "sexy". And he wasn't about to argue. The clothes were familiar, but he missed his pockets. He supposed it was a small price to pay for being human.

So with all of the abrupt changes in his life, he realised he needed a job. He scratched his head when Pete had asked him what he wanted to do. Part of him wanted to be a teacher, after all, he knew pretty much everything. But, his single heart was telling him to be as close to Rose as possible.

Torchwood. He had begun to work at Torchwood. The place that he had fought so hard against. He know was the specialist on aliens at the very institution which had set out to destroy him. Only Rose was privvy to his true Time Lord-ness. At least, that's what he thought.

Jacqueline Lark, the head of Torchwood, as well as the head nurse, Rory Pond, knew his secret. And they kept their mouths tight-lipped. He hoped.

His eyes had bugged out upon seeing Jacqueline. He even rubbed his eyes to make sure he wasn't imagining things. He looked to Rose, who bit back a giggle, eyes shining. She nodded, as if to say 'I know, right?'

Jacqueline was a female version of their Jack. He silently cursed their friend, because even as woman, he was attractive. Their wonderful, pompous Jack. She grinned at the Doctor, batting her eyelids. He sent a frightened glance to Rose, who shrugged.

"Anything with a postcode," Rose had told him later, after the nerve-wracking interrogation he had undergone.

Rory had been far kinder. He ran tests on the Doctor while engaging him and Rose in polite conversation. He mobile rang, and he excused himself to the corner of the room.

"_What? No, Amelia. What? A robbery. You're _excited_? Be careful. Love you, too. Yes, yes, I'll be careful too. Bye."_

He turned off the mobile, looking apologetically to the time-traveling couple.

"Sorry, it was the wife."

"She's a cop, yeah?" Rose asked, remembering what a conversation they'd had.

"Leadworth's best. Right here in London, now," he grinned proudly.

"So, Doctor Smith," Rory focused, "as far as I can tell you have fully human biology. One heart, one brain, two lungs..."

He nodded, wincing as another headache struck him. The pain had been there since the metacrisis, but as time went on the headaches became stronger. He dared not tell Rose about it. She didn't need to worry about him. She was already moody, going from depressed to neurotic to elated.

Rory noted the slight wince.

"Miss Tyler, if you don't mind, I'd like to speak to Doctor Smith alone," he told the blonde.

"Right. Course," Rose stood, leaving the room after giving a reassuring smile to John.

Once Rose had left, Rory sent a concerned glance to his patient.

"Doctor, you winced," he observed.

"Yep. And?"

"How long have you been having the headaches?" he asked, ready to jot things down.

"Since the metacrisis. It hasn't been too bad."

"We need to do a scan of your brain, to make sure there's no underlying cause. As of now it's probably from the stress of the change," Rory explained matter-of-factly.

"Right. Let's do this then."

An hour later, Rory let Rose back into the medical room, telling them to get to work.

"What did he want to talk to you about?" Rose quereied.

"Just wanted to make sure my brain's alright. Nothing serious," he waved off her concern.

Rose nodded silently and bit her lip. The Doctor reached his hand out, wiggling his fingers. Rose took it, gladly, and led him to the lab.

She gave him a brief introduction to the people there. The Doctor was Dr. John Smith, from Scotland. He used to be a professor and had studied extensively about alien life. A few fellow workers looked at him suspiciously, as if recognising him. The Doctor placed his glasses on his face to see what they had gathered around.

"Y'know what this is, Rose?" a petite brunette asked excitedly, pointing to the creature.

"No clue," Rose kneeled down next to it to see if she recognised it.

The Doctor leaned over her shoulder, furrowing his brow.

"It's hurt," he said.

"How can you tell?" a sceptical man asked.

"The noise it's making is one of pain. Those blue markings aren't part of their appearance. It's a Chelonian," he gestured to the tortoise like humanioid, "haven't seen one in years. Hello!" he greeted.

"Humans are parasites," it said.

"Yes, yes, I know. Heard it all before," the Doctor babbled, "someone get Rory to patch him up. We'll send you home."

Rose smiled lightly at the Chelonian, who glared. Her smile faded into a frown quickly.

"Chelonia's quite advanced. Their downfall, really," the Doctor began to babble as Rory rushed over to tend to the wounds.

Rose shook her head, linking her arm with the Doctor's. This felt so normal. So right. It's as if everything had fallen into place.

The Doctor grinned. He was back in his element, sort of. Everything was looking up, and he was human.

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><p><strong>So, about the latest episode. I'm super scared that the 'good man' River kills is Rory. The way she said hello to him in the Stormcage was so sad. Like she knows that he won't see her again. River probably tries to kill the Doctor, Rory intervenes (and is killed), so River sends herself to prison. Or she's raised by Amy in the Gamma Forest. The man is too awesome to die (again). Honestly, Moffat. Give him a rest. It's like South Park and killing Kenny. Yeesh.<strong>

**Please review. I greatly appreciate it. The lack of reviews had gotten me a bit down, but I'll keep writing.**


	6. Behind Blue Eyes

**A prequel to Bridging the Gap. Inspired by a Youtube video about the Human Doctor and Rose set to "Fix You" by Coldplay. Tennant's Coldplay love makes it all the better, I think. I don't own Doctor Who or the songs used.**

**Once again, apologies for the long wait. I'm in the middle of packing up for university, so things are quite hectic.**

**As I've said before, this fic is pretty timey-wimey. It jumps back and forth, so it's not in chronological order. Expect the future for the next chapter.**

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><p><strong>Behind Blue Eyes<strong>

_No one knows what it's like  
>To be the bad man<br>To be the sad man  
>Behind blue eyes <em>

_-The Who, "Behind Blue Eyes"_

The past few months had been fantastic for Rose Tyler. She was reunited with the love of her life, she had a good job, and had a flat to call her very own. She had been quite skeptical at first, accepting this man who was a clone of the Doctor. Unconsciously, she began to fall for him, noticing the similarities and quirks both men shared. Except now, her Doctor could age with her. Could love her. And would never leave her again. Or so she hoped. Despite the joy she felt, there was always that nagging feeling that he would disappear one day, leaving nothing in his wake, leaving her tearful and dejected.

At the moment she was in the market, grocery shopping. Her Doctor was currently at home, resting due to a terrible headache.

'_I can see her, Rose,' he breathed, squinting._

_'Who?' she asked curiously._

_'Donna. It's like I can feel when she's upset, or happy. Or starting to remember, little things that give her fleeting thoughts, memories,' he wrenched his eyes shut._

Donna Noble, the greatest woman in all of creation. The Doctor could sense her, from another world away. Rose was sad for the woman. She would never remember the Doctor and would live out a mundane, boring life. She deserved so much more. Rory from Torchwood had run tests on the man others knew as John Smith. His brain waves were hectic, scattered, but only momentarily. He figured the connection would fade as the Doctor adjusted more to life as a human. Now that the rift was completely sealed, the physical distance from the other world was even greater.

Rose shook herself out of her thoughts as she looked around the fruit aisle. She knew to avoid pears. She picked up some apples, grapes. Her heart stopped and her stomach clenched. Bananas.

She could see a man with a leather jacket and bright blue eyes dropping bananas into the plastic bag as if there would be none left. Her breath hitched as his gaze met hers. He gave her a smile, one of his beautiful smiles, holding up the bag.

"Bananas are good," he said simply. His voice was even the same.

She felt her legs wobble under her weight, her heart beating rapidly.

Rose nodded, itching to get closer to him. It couldn't be the man she knew, could it? Had he gone universe hopping? Was this before they even met? He looked the same. Quiet, stoic. And so, so sad. She knew now that he had destroyed all of Gallifrey. That he had been lonely.

_'You make me better, Rose,'_ her Doctor told her. She had apparently saved him from running off and being reckless, but what did this mean? Was the ninth Doctor on a bender? Her younger self was nowhere to be seen.

He looked at her curiously, as if recognizing her. His eyes pierced into her, trying to figure out who she was. Her eyes welled up with tears. It couldn't be him, it couldn't. He was gone, and would never return. Yet she so desperately wanted it to be him.

"Doctor?" she heard herself choke out before she could stop herself.

The man walked over to her, eyes searching hers.

"Do you need a doctor?" he asked lowly.

Rose bit her lip, "Is it you, Doctor?"

She prayed he wouldn't think she was insane.

"Rose," he whispered softly, almost as if he were wishing it were her.

"Yes, Doctor, it's me," she threw her arms around his neck.

It felt good to have his hands wrapped around her. So familiar, so right.

"What're you doing here?" he asked quietly.

Rose pulled away, "I'm here. With you. Well, sort of you," she babbled.

"A regeneration," he guessed.

Rose nodded. Close enough. He didn't have to know. He shouldn't know.

"Last time I saw you it was 2005 and I had dropped you off at Jackie's," he grinned, "Got here quite accidentally, really."

She tried to smile, but he could see right through her. Years of angst and longing were bubbling to the surface. _No! She had gone through this. It was over and done with. She had her Doctor and he made her happy. Yet she couldn't help but wonder what her life would've been like if the Doctor had never regenerated because of the Bad Wolf. Would they still have been separated at Canary Wharf? _She shook her head, dispelling the thoughts from her mind. She was happy now. She repeated it to herself. She was happy now.

The Doctor took in this older, more sombre Rose. Somehow, he knew it was his fault that she looked so tired. So distressed. So sad. Was he sad, too, in the near future?

"I haven't had bananas in ages," she mumbled with a slight grin.

His face brightened, and he took her hand. Rose was transported to the time with the store dummies. To the first time he saved her life. The first time he had yelled at her to run.

She looked up at him, "I don't suppose you could come with me."

He looked at her sadly, "I'd be crossing into my future time line. I couldn't."

Rose wanted to scream. To tell him that he wouldn't be crossing into _his _future time line because there were two Doctors. The one in their old universe, who was probably off having grand adventures, and the one in this universe, who was tied down to lowly Rose Tyler. The Doctor who probably resented her. Sure, he might put on a happy face and pretend to accept being a human and living a normal life, but he always checked on the TARDIS growing in the yard of the Tyler estate.

_'Rose and the Doctor, travelling the stars. As it should be,' he had told her when they planted the coral._

"Rose?" the Doctor's blue eyes were right in front of her, his hands on her shoulders.

She bit her lip, trying not to cry. He hugged her close to him. She relaxed in his touch, taking in the scent of the worn leather.

"Have I-no, has the future me, done something to upset you?" he asked.

She shook her head. The future him was perfect, both of them. No matter what, she'd always love the Doctor, no matter his appearance or race (Gallifreyan, human, whatever). Her Doctor was always there, always waiting, being patient. Always his odd, brilliant self. They had made so much progress. She couldn't go back to sulking. No, she wouldn't.

"No. He's perfect," she smiled.

The Doctor looked at the genuine smile crossing her features and grinned.

"Rose Tyler, you're fantastic. Never forget that," he said quietly.

Her smile brightened as she hugged the ninth Doctor for the last time.

"Pass me a banana, will you?" she asked him cheekily.

"Oh, fantastic!" he smiled goofily.

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><p><strong>I really miss Christopher Eccelston. As much as I love Tennant, I'd be more inclined to trust Eccleston when running from monsters. I like Matt Smith, too, but Rory is such a badass, I like him more.<strong>

**Please review.**


	7. The Doctor is Dying

**I don't own Doctor Who. **

**The Doctor is Dying**

_He's going to regenerate  
>A new man saunters away<br>__ -Chameleon Circuit 'The Doctor is Dying' _

He was supposed to be happy, supposed to be accepting his life as a human, supposed to be a lot of things. He sat in the bar with Rory, celebrating his wife's pregnancy with a few drinks. (Said wife was not there). He listened as the younger man spoke so lovingly of his wife, of his unborn child, regaling him with the plans he had for the littly tyke.

The human Doctor had no such plans. He did love Rose, with all his (single) heart. He wanted to marry her, sure, and he wanted them to be happy. He couldn't think further than that at the moment. All he could think of was the pain he caused, the guilt that weighed on his shoulders.

He'd destroyed the Daleks (then again, so had Bad Wolf-Rose), Martha's family suffered because of him, and Rose got stuck on another bloody planet. Sure, they were together now, but he felt guilty nonetheless. The tears, the heartache, were they all worth it?

Thinking about it made his head hurt. The headaches had been subsiding, but this pain wasn't like the ones he'd felt due to his Timelord knoweldge being crammed into a puny human brain. No, this was different. His fingers and toes itched. Burned.

Rory looked at him in distress, "Doctor? John, you alright?"

He shook his head, unable to move. Dear heavens, it burned. It felt like a regeneration. Was he somehow still linked with the real Doctor? Was he regenerating?

The pain overtook him, and when he came to, he was at Torchwood. He was laying down on the bed, Rory hovering, and Rose looking frightened and sad. She tended to look sad whenever he felt unwell.

"Doctor?" she took his hand.

"Rose," he croaked, looking blearily into her worried eyes.

"Rory, will he be alright? What's going on?"

The young man sighed, looking a lot older than he was, "The Doctor in the other universe is regenerating. He gets a whole new body and heals himself, but he can't. He feels everything the other one feels," he gestured to the human Doctor.

Rose visibly paled, looking frantic.

"He can't die," Rose looked at the man known as John Smith.

The Doctor didn't know if she was talking about him or the other Doctor. Perhaps both.

"Do something, please," she looked back at Rory.

"All we can do is keep him here for observation. Hopefully it's just the fever and the pain, since we can treat those symptoms."

This was Rose's cue to leave. She didn't. She stayed with him the night, holding his hand as he burned like the sun. She spoke softly as he slept, about their adventures, about the plans she had made. She'd gone shopping with Jackie, found a perfect wedding dress. She talked about how she was happy, so very happy that they had each other, that they could love one another, that they were getting married. She confided that if she lost him again she wouldn't be able to go on. She mourned the loss of the other Doctor, the one she knew, and hoped the new one taking his place would never forget his companions and friends.

She hoped that the new Doctor would not be the cause of death for her Doctor, the one sleeping at the very moment.

She suddenly gasped, as if a new memory entered her mind. It was from before she even met him, him in the corner, telling her she'd have a great year. She looked down at the ring on her finger and started to cry. She was certain the new Doctor would remember her, but he'd always change and leave. Her Doctor would never do that again.

"What is it?" he asked her with a hoarse voice.

"Never leave, please, I don't think I could take it again," she said quietly, pleading.

"Neither could I," he cracked a grin, causing her to smile in relief.

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><p><strong>This took a while to churn out. I'm a wee bit obsessed with Arthur Darvill and Rory, so, yeah. Rose and the Doctor are getting on with their lives! Yay! Perchance the wedding is next? Please review.<strong>


	8. Kiss from a Rose

**I don't own Doctor Who. Prepare for this to be sappy.**

**Kiss from a Rose**

****_You became the light on the dark side of me.  
>Love remained a drug that's the high and not the pill.<br>But did you know,  
>That when it snows,<br>My eyes become large and  
>The light that you shine can be seen<br>Baby,  
>I compare you to a kiss from a rose on the gray<em>

-Seal, 'Kiss from a rose'

It didn't matter who was there and who wasn't on that day. It didn't matter that the day started off gloomy and she ran across the wet grass, skirts of the flowing white dress in her hands, because she was running to him. No matter what, they always seemed to be running, but this time, just this once, they weren't running away from anything. They were running towards each other.

It didn't matter that they got caught in the rain and that Jackie Tyler threw a fit because they went missing during the reception. All that mattered was that Rose Tyler and the Doctor were there, happy.

If you asked them now, they wouldn't remember much of the actual ceremony. All they could remember was the way they looked, the way they felt, coccooned in their own little world.

Her blonde hair was swept away from her face, a few tendrils having gone askew in the rain. Her large hazel eyes stared back at him, smile permanently etched on her face. He smiled back, in his cheeky little way, unable to focus on anything going on but her.

After they were pronounced husband and wife, at the reception filled with friends from Torchwood (including a very touchy-feely Mr and Mrs Rory) and Pete and Jackie's friends, they slipped away.

He draped his suit jacket over her shoulders, stretching out his hand. She took it, smiling up at him. They wandered outside to the garden, the air crisp after a fresh rain. The ground was still damp, but she didn't care, letting her dress drag along the mud. The clouds had parted, revealing the night sky etched with shining stars.

His arm was wrapped around her waist as they looked up, him pointing at different stars.

"So, Mrs Doctor," he started with a grin.

She laughed, wrapping her arms around him, "Yes, Doctor?"

"Guess what?" he asked, swaying lightly as the moonlight beamed onto them.

"What?" she couldn't stop smiling as he looked happier than she'd ever seen him.

"I'm not alone anymore, Rose. Left traveling alone because there's no one else," he started.

"There's me," she echoed words that seemed they were from a whole nother life, a dream maybe.

He nodded slightly. Hands intertwined, she kissed her husband soundly. It was something she had a feeling she'd never get used to-kissing the Doctor, her husband. And the Doctor was kissing Rose Tyler Noble-Smith, his wife. They'd have the house with the four walls, doors, the carpet, the mortagage, everything. They would even share. Because she was Rose and he was the Doctor and it was just _right_. Standing there, under the stars, they knew they had just embarked upon their next big adventure.

Rose looked up at the sky once more, "It's all waiting out there, Doctor."

He nodded, "Quite right. Where should we start?"

She didn't mean all of time and space. He knew that. It was their life she was talking about. The whole 'doing domestic' wasn't as cringeworthy as he thought it'd be.

It really didn't matter who was at the wedding, so long as they were there. They couldn't tell you who was on the guest list, or the band that played. They could, however, tell you that the stars were never brighter as they were on that night. He could tell you the exact conversation they had, and she could tell you the way his eyes crinkled when he smiled. She later refused to have her pretty, white (stained with mud) dress dry cleaned, and Jackie had been upset that it was 'ruined'. The photographer had agreed with her, but Rose and the Doctor just laughed. None of that mattered.

The best picture from the wedding was of Rose, muddy dress and all, wearing the Doctor's jacket, his arm draped over her shoulder, both of them just laughing.

She had her Doctor, and he had his Rose. That's all that mattered.

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><p><strong>Apologies for taking so long. College is stressful, to say the least. I hope it was an enjoyable chapter. I didn't want them to be all 'I love you' because with them it's so much more what they <em>didn't<em> say, but said it through their actions. This is slowly crawling into 'Bridging the Gap' territory, so there's going to be more future, less past. Yippee!**


	9. Wonderful Christmastime

**Sorry for the wait. I've been getting plot-bunny ideas lately. Now that finals are over, I fully intend to update more regularly.**

* * *

><p><strong>Simply Having A Wonderful Christmastime<strong>

_The party's on _  
><em>The spirit's up <em>  
><em>We're here tonight <em>  
><em>And that's enough<br>-Wonderful Christmastime-Paul McCartney _

The tree stood in the flat, filled with twinkling lights and ornaments. Red and gold were the colours of choice, and he remarked that they must be Gryffindors. She burst out laughing, running her fingers along the glass gingerly. She rummaged through the box, picking up tinsel and throwing it on the tree.

This was the first year they had their own decorations. The year before, Christmas was spent at the Jackie and Pete's home. The grand hall had a majestic tree, adorned with silver ornaments and cool white lights. That tree was for Pete's party for his co-workers and employees.

The real tree at the Tylers' was in the living room. It was smaller, more modest. Tony had made most of the decorations himself, and the ones bought from the store were mismatched. Jackie wouldn't have it any other way. The wrapping paper covering the presents were as loud and colourful as Jackie Tyler herself.

The Doctor thought that Christmas was pretty perfect, but he thinks this one would be even better.

Rose grinned at her handiwork. Her own tree, in her own flat, with her own husband. It was perfect.

"I think it's the best tree ever," she commented.

"It's not trying to kill us, so that's a plus," the Doctor quipped.

Rose stuck her tongue out at him. Hm. A Christmas without an invasion or monsters or something dangerous. She liked adventure, sure, but this was so much better.

The Doctor hung up two stockings on the wall, by the window. They had no fireplace (something Rose had considered to be a good thing when they were picking flats. Who knows which French royal would be on the other side).

"I think we're done," Rose bit her lip, examining the living room.

The tree was dressed and sparkling, the stockings were hung, mistletoe hung from the door frame, and the Doctor had lined twinkling lights along the walls.

* * *

><p>They had dinner at the mansion. They sat along the usually imposing dining room table, but all the imposition was null. A turkey sat in the middle, with the potatoes and gravy, salad, and Christmas pudding. Tony had enthusiastically created paper crowns for the lot of them, which now sat atop their heads.<p>

The Doctor laughed along with Tony's stories from school, remembering the first Christmas he had with this family. Even then, it felt right. Rose turned her attention away from her brother and smiled at the Doctor.

He couldn't help but grin back like the giddy fool he was.

* * *

><p>The Doctor's arm was wrapped around her waist, her head resting on his chest. They were snuggled together under a large, warm blanket on the couch. His other hand played with the ends of her hair, the blonde glowing under the Christmas lights.<p>

Presents had been exchanged. Rose had gotten the Doctor a wristwatch, and the Doctor had gotten her a silver chain to be worn around her neck or wrist.

Rose laughed at how they had gotten each other matching presents. She thought it was wonderful, and the Doctor agreed.

"What do you wish for for the new year?" Rose asked quietly, listening to his heart beat.

"I already have everything I want, right here," the Doctor replied, "you?"

"I have everything I could ever imagine. There's one thing, though," she said with a small smile.

"And what would that be?" he asked.

"A baby," she admitted, waiting for the Doctor to tell her it was a horrible idea.

Instead, his face brightened and he smiled, "A little girl or boy, running around, causing havoc. Fantastic."

He remembered his children from long ago, and he remembered Susan. Yes, he'd missed having kids around. His smile faltered a little as he tried not to let memories of Gallifrey enter his thoughts.

Rose sat up, tentative smile on her face, "Yeah?"

"Oh, I'd love it," the Doctor pressed a kiss to her lips.

Rose hugged him tightly, whispering in his ear. He nodded with a cheeky grin and swept her off of the couch, carrying her into their room. It was never too early to start trying.

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><p><strong>Yay for babies and Christmas. <strong>


	10. Tears in Heaven

**This one's a bit sad and angsty. You've been warned. Actually, a bit is an understatement.  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Tears in Heaven<strong>

_Would you know my name_  
><em>If I saw you in heaven?<br>-Eric Clapton "Tears in Heaven"_

She sat alone on the rocking chair he had built. Her blonde hair was limp and dry, as if she'd not washed it for days. Her eyes were puffy with dark rings surrounding them. Silent tears rolled down her cheeks as she rocked back and forth.

He watched from the door frame, unable to go inside. The pale blue walls they'd painted, the crib they'd built, the mobile of stars and moons hanging over it, the stuffed animals, everything in that room was now for nothing.

He remembers how excited she had been when the test was positive. How they'd gone to Rory to check on her, just in case. Just because he was a human now didn't mean they had no reason to worry.

The Doctor-no, John Smith, had only himself to blame. He'd wanted to give Rose Tyler a normal life, but here she was in tears because their child was gone. Even if he was technically 'human', he just ended up hurting her again and again.

She clutched a teddy bear to her chest, shoulders shaking.

"Rose," his voice cracked, "dinner's ready."

"Not hungry," she mumbled.

The last time she'd had a proper meal was days ago, before she had gone into a state of depression. Sure, she nibbled on a piece of bread this morning, but all she'd willingly take from the kitchen was a glass of water. She was weak and thin, quite thin when compared to a week ago when her stomach was round.

He closed his eyes, remembering that terrible day. He'd gone into work, leaving her alone. If he'd only been there, maybe their little boy would still be alive. Instead he came home to find the paramedics parked outside their flat, a sobbing, hysteric Rose being tended to by a medic. She held his hand and refused to believe the medics, insisting on having Rory check, just to make sure.

He couldn't have seen how it'd gone wrong. Rory had checked him for any traces that his Time Lord DNA would harm the baby or Rose, and he'd found nothing.

"You have to eat something, please," he practically begged. _I can't lose you again._

She nodded slightly, getting up from the chair. She gently placed the teddy bear on the rocking hair and wiped tears away from her pale face. She offered a strained smile and John's heart broke all over again.

He stepped into the room he'd been avoiding and held her as she fell to the carpeted floor. Days of not eating would do that to a person. Fresh tears welled in her eyes and he simply held her and kissed her hair.

He needed to be strong and not cry. Soon enough, his tears mingled with hers. She hugged him as if afraid he'd disappear.

"We'll get through this," he said with as much conviction as he could muster.

Rose shook her head, "Our baby's gone. How can we ever get through this?"

For once, the man who had all the answers (well, almost all the answers), was at a loss for words. There was nothing he clever he could say to cheer up Rose Tyler. He was afraid that he'd never see the smile he loved so much ever again.

"He's in heaven now," she murmured. A small ghost of a smile crossed her lips. The thought that they'd see each other one day comforted her, but the pain was still too raw.

John nodded, "He's being well taken care of."

He hugged her once more and kissed her softly.

"Dinner, then?" she asked in a small voice.

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><p><strong>Sorry for the downer chapter. <strong>

**Happy New Year and thank you for reading and the reviews and adding to favorites/alerts.  
><strong>


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